Thanks for Dinner Trader Joe's!

This is dinner for $9.99 ..to celebrate / un-celebrate my being canceled from work tonight.

But if there is any reason to celebrate really, it is this TORTA! yummyness!

I love sun-dried tomatoes, I love pesto, and I love anything cheesy, when you put them all together, haaaayyy... :D

I Love Brussels Sprouts!

Dinner anyone?

Baked Salmon and... Roasted Brussels Sprouts!

Everyone loves Salmon, but not everyone loves Brussels Sprouts! I DO!

especially when they're roasted in the oven until the outside is crispy but the inside is soft and juicy! :)

Roasted with olive oil, a little garlic, salt and pepper.
Then! drizzled with Balsamic Vinegar and grated Romano Cheese!

happyfood!

Sticky Note to Self

1. Eat less.
2. Eat more fruits and vegetables.
3. Strengthen relationships.
4. Be kinder, in both thoughts and actions.
5. Call home more often.
6. Perfect a recipe.
7. Work more.
8. Fold laundry on the same day it is washed.
9. Work more. (I'm aware of the repeat)
10. Lose weight.

Down the Gutter

I've been feeling out of my element lately. I haven't been feeling myself. Depressed. Broke. Homesick. Sick. I don't know if this heartburn and nausea are physical or emotional? Hormonal? I don't know. All I know is that I feel horrible. I've tried to laugh it out or cry it out, but the creepy feeling of having come undone is relentless inside me.

I hate that I feel angry, and I displace it to people who are nothing but nice to me. And I shouldn't be feeling irritated with people who need me at this point in their lives, who also are struggling and weak. I want to eat myself alive and give birth to it, clean, innocent and resentment-free. Of course I don't shout my anger out, nor curse, nor raise an eyebrow, nor be mean. Typical of me, I keep it in, and it is gnawing on my gut. It's anger NOT directed towards anyone in particular, it's just anger, period. I don't know where it is coming from, or maybe it really isn't anger afterall, just another undesirable emotion in the guise of something else, or maybe it's a combination of many, like a halo-halo only the unpleasant version of it.

I guess my inner battle transcends its ugliness out in the open, as my friends have tried to cheer me up last night, and have asked several times, "are you okay?" I did have a fast answer to the question: YES, I'M OKAY. My always ready answer. But of course, it's a NO. And if indeed I said No, I'm sure there would've been the instinctive follow-up WHY. That would've have been utterly painful trying to answer that. So rather, I drowned myself in pure fat that's in roasted duck, roasted pork, fried rice, chicharon bulaklak and downed them with a bottle of beer / a tall glass of Ko Ko Mo from that quaint little Hawaiian Bar after watching Step Up 3 in 3D. Ko Ko Mo, should I explain, is a drink of Vodka, coconut milk, etc etc. I don't know I just gulped it in mindless of the taste as if clogging my arteries would make my heart numb.

I am a wreck right now, even thinking of calling in sick from work. Good idea? Bad idea? I just feel like I need to have the night off. `Coz the last time I pushed it, I was a mess at work. Embarrassing myself to the hospitalist (the 'house' doctor) for grabbing a non-rebreather mask instead of what should've been a Venti mask, to my co-worker Ate Myra (but I couldn't be thankful enough that she was team leader that night, or I would've just crawled to the restroom and cried the mighty out) whom I've asked to insert a Foley catheter for me and to access a Port to a sarcastic patient (of all patients). I was so shattered that I felt like Ate Myra was picking my pieces up in the hallways of 3 South all night.

I was joking about that quarter-life crisis when I turned 24 last month. But maybe I really am in crisis right now. ?! I am questioning my place in life, if this is really where I want to be? And if it is not, where do I start? Ahhhhh, too much questions!

.... there, anxiety-ridden and all, I just called-in sick!

maybe it should've been called-in depressed? called-in sad? called-in confused?

Now I don't know if leaving myself alone with myself is a good idea. I just need to, remove myself for now.

Someone save me. let me.

------------------------------

...and then my dad tweeted / posted on his Facebook wall:

I can't catch up with my beloved Tal, even in FB. So fleeting. Kamusta ka na Tal?

So fleeting. that's right. I am so fleeting. I wanted to burst into tears. the last thing I want to happen is detach myself from my family. but am I now?

-----------------------------

Gail Simmons, in one Top Chef commercial, said that there was a distinct moment in her life when she absolutely didn't know what to do until a friend asked her to make a list of the things she loves : which were FOOD, TRAVEL, WRITING. and look where she is today...

now if I make list of the things I love, it would be : FOOD, TRAVEL AND WRITING ABOUT THEM too.

I don't know, I've been thinking long and hard about where I am right now. Have I ever said, to myself or anyone, that I LOVED nursing? Maybe at one point I did mention that I like my job now, or I said that the new hospital I work at is better than the last one. But I don't think I ever so passionately talked about my job. And I choose not to talk about it after work, wanting to leave work at work. I live paycheck-to-paycheck basically. Working to be able to pay the bills, to be able to eat, shop a little if there's any extra. It doesn't help being surrounded with people who seem to be burnt-out by their job neither! Look what it has gotten me.... complaining, whining. It doesn't make me the bigger person I know. But I just gotta let it out somehow, even at least in this blog which no one really reads!

Nursing is a such a noble profession. I applaud anyone who has chosen this job for the passion of it. But did I choose this job because I had the passion for it? What really was my motivation in the first place? That was the question during my admission interview in West, "why did you choose nursing?" and that question still pops up every once in a while, "ngaa nag nurse ka?" ...and my answer has never been resolute and confident. It always has been as if I'm trying to convince the other person just as much as I am trying to convince myself. I can't even remember what I answered. I guess I said that both my parents were in the medical field and that's how I've been brought up - eekk. Listening to myself I just said 'were' coz both of them aren't anymore. They still are, technically, but... They started as doctors and now are in a totally different position in their lives.... and looking at them, they are happy. I look at my dad and I say, I want to be like him, in the sense that, man does he love what he's doing right now! My dad never complains, he's always on the go, always in his element, passionate. And he is good what he does and doesn't stop getting better! Plus he is able to do his hobbies too, like photography, gadgets, traveling.

There is a war inside of me though. I don't want to be a quitter, someone who can't seem to finish something right all the time. I've always been half hearted with things, and though my parents, especially my mom, never really say it in my face, I know they've been frustrated. When I was a freshman in Nursing school, my mom told me to do well 'coz I can be a cum laude, or something like that. I never really cared, though. I thought that laude was a far dream and I wasn't made to reach it, couldn't reach it. Of course my mom never pushes anything to us, gives us valuable advice but doesn't pressure us to do anything... I wish she did, but I'm happy she didn't / doesn't as well. So I just went by with my college life not really putting 100% effort to it. Until my senior year came and I was points away from that laude laude. And then, that Most Outstanding Student Nurse award, which was also so near yet so far. I fought for it at some point, but in retrospect, whoever got the award deserved it more than I do. She has more passion that I do, did. Bottomline is, I always underestimate myself, never give myself wholeheartedly until the last straw, I always flinch away - much to my parents' frustration. My frustration.

And that's what I do not want to happen right now. To be fleeting away, just as my dad perfectly describes me. I became a nurse I might as well be damn good at it. Make myself proud, make my family proud. But, why do I feel like my heart is somewhere else? Why don't I close my eyes and giggle for my little accomplishments in this job? Why can't I picture myself doing this for the rest of my life?

There is a lot of soul searching, de-cluttering, prioritizing, realizing, praying that I have to do, instead of complaining and whining in this blog. But if talking about it is a first step, maybe I can go forward.

Everest Highway

...9 months upon a time.

Everest Highway

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Monday, November 2, 2009 at 2:34am | Edit Note | Delete

1:46 AM in frost stricken Chicago technically nearing 3 AM as the end of Daylight Saving Time has just graced most people with one more hour of glorious sleep.. good for them.. as this time change doesn't do much to my constant struggle to be normal, sleep-wise.

my bittersweet relationship with sleep..

when you're awake at this hour and just staring at a computer screen, you kind of hate your so-called "apartment engineer" for making the temperature too high you need the put the aircon on when it's 40F outside.. then you realize that it was you who told him it was too cold in the first place. so you think, do you hate him or do you hate yourself? and you realize the latter makes more sense, so you shut the idea off and just settle to paying what extra dollars on your next electric bill. yes, just another way to save money in these tough times.

or.. you attempt to perfect a hard-boiled egg with your electric stove that tips your pan and boils water only on one side. and you are short of 5 minutes, as the yolk is set and firm on the outside but still somewhat jiggly and soft on the inside. some people like it that way, but not you, who want your yolk "hard-boiled" that it sticks to your palate and scratches your throat you need water to down it. 20 minutes, as your lola said so..even in your San Francisco-terrain-ed stove top.

or..you sit through both parts of the Earth's Natural Wonders on the Travel Channel and learn that Mt. Everest has a highway, oh yes it does..that you wish you were in Alaska right now to gaze at the Northern Lights dancing in all your favorite colors instead of pathetically writing about it in your tiny studio apartment..that you imagine what the inhabitants of the Amazon River are doing right this very moment, probably something far more productive than what you are.. and that you have appreciated the world you live in in one hour in the 23 years you have spent on it.

your 24-hour rental of the The Proposal is almost up and your good ol' comforter is but your only comforter, you wish this note-ing gets your eyes tired and weary.. but they just won't give up.. your countdown, sorry to say, lives on..

tomorrow, you'll probably be thanking your bittersweet relationship with sleep as you traverse the hallways of the Oncology Floor, your very own Everest Highway.

over the steam that comes out of this Starbucks cup

A morning graced with a grande cup of Starbucks Americano. I want my coffee straightforward like this.

3 days before Eat Pray Love the movie shows. I am crying over the trailer as I have cried over things like, MasterChef? Who cries over these things but me?

I am crying because I imagine getting lost in this movie as I have in the book. Maybe I am an incurable sentimental... a girl who tends to exalt a song, a movie, a meal, or anything mundane, like it is something bigger than itself, like it is transcendental. The perfect word that describes how I see things sometimes (...most of the time, I just am embarrassed to admit it), weird as it sounds.

This is why I love the Eat Pray Love. EAT PRAY LOVE is a perfect definition of who I am, or.. how I am getting to know myself. It is like one word to me, eatpraylove. Elizabeth Gilbert unraveled the self that is within myself into a New York Times Best Seller. While reading the book I can feel like I am with her..and her journey to find herself one plane ticket, one train ride, one friend, one stranger, one meal at a time.

The City and CUPCAKES!

What an early jog for most people is an early morning drive for me, whenever I get a chance. One overcast summer morning, I took off to the Eisenhower again (Interstate 290 E), with Passion Pit (my new favorite band) keeping me company. Traffic wasn't bad on this Tuesday morning. I've been quite lucky lately.

As long as I have senora (my navi, my security blanket), I'm good. Ohhh I can't live without Nuvi (her real name ;p Garmin Nuvi)!

What started as an aimless drive ended downtown. of course. The feel of the city is exhilarating! I've been downtown many many-a-times, but I still feel giddy and happy like it's the first time every time! I've always loved big cities! And Chicago I'm falling in love deeper and deeper with. It's only recently that I finally pinched myself and said, "you're here, embrace it!" I've been an itchyfoot the past two something years, I've thought of moving to California (got a California RN license!), then considered New York after my aunt's and other family friends' unyielding persuasion.

But Chicago is an amazing city in so many ways! It is dark (a Gotham City-like ambience) but very warm and inviting as well. I guess what it took is for me to approach it like a backpacker would instead of a typical OFW. Now I am wide-eyed with everything Chi Town has to offer! I'm not about the BIG stuff. There are little surprises out there.

Like....
CUPCAKES! :))

more Cupcakes, to be specific. (one east delaware place in chicago, illinois 60611)

I was cynical about all this cupcake hype the past couple of years. I have a huge, nagging sweet tooth, but, cupcakes?! I've tried some until this....

I can't even put into words the experience I had with these cupcakes. I just had my I-roll-my-eyes-I-think-I-just-died-and-went-to-heaven moment. Aahhh just read (*copy-pasted* from More's website) :

located in chicago's gold coast neighborhood at one e. delaware place, (state & delaware), more opened its modern art museum-meets-cupcake boutique in september of 2008.

owner, patty rothman, (and self-proclaimed cupcake curator), opened more with the sole vision of embracing excess in every bite. at more the cupcake sheds its swirls and sprinkles - and evolves into a sophisticated and luxurious indulgence to be coveted.

each blissful bite of a cupcake from more is moist, rich, perfectly balanced, delightfully decadent and totally transforming. more cupcakes embrace the extraordinary – from the individually crafted recipes to the artisan ingredients to the elegant packaging.

now, take a deep breath:
























(L-R: Salted Caramel, the signature More cupcake, Coconut Mango, Black & White, Red Velvet, Cookies & Cream)

look look look at that salted caramel oozing out of the most decadent, dense, vanilla cake! and that icing I can't even explain... it's beyonnddd. sooooo gooooddd!















and the signature More cupcake... all I can say is, my goodness gracious. I wish I took a better picture to document this glorious experience, but I knew this wouldn't be my last. I know it looks like a twinkie that you can get in your neighborhood grocery store, but wait until you put this in your mouth! You can't help but close your eyes and giggle and embarrass yourself! seriously. it is sooooo goood. I can go on and on but thanks to More's website for 'putting words in my mouth.':

...witness the signature more cupcake: a dark, valrhona chocolate cake, laden with an ethereal cream, and topped with a pristine chocolate ganache



the red velvet cupcake is also to-die-for! I'm not a big fan of icing but I am big fan of more's cream cheese frosting!!! a red velvet cake is really just a chocolate cake with red food coloring, but because it's red, it makes you think that you're eating a completely different cake all its own. see what your mind can do to your tongue. this one, though, is a completely different cupcake all its own! :) another must-try from mores.











there's still 3 more cupcakes in that box, and there's about five steps from where I am, writing this blog on my bed, and the refrigerator ;D

and that's just the sweet stuff! didn't even get the savory and the specialty yet ...

bacon maple!
strawberry balsamic!!!
goat fig merlot!!!!
blue cheese walnut praline!!!!!
bacon white truffle!!!!!!
blt!!!!!!!
mojito!!!!!!!!
margarita!!!!!!!!!
gin & juice!!!!!!!!!!

you really can't stop having more of more.

I really have to end this. very sweet dreams!:))

On the WINGS of love!

My dear friend Marielle, Nang Marielle as I call her as she is 4 years older than me, went out for the one thing we do best --- EAT :)

This time we went to Great Sea's Chinese Restaurant, a hole-in-the-wall kind of restaurant along Lawrence Ave. It's not the place that will lure you in. It actually looks dingy on the outside, even inside, BUT the place is packed, every table is seated, and every table has a heaping plate of HOT AND SPICY KOREAN-STYLE CHICKEN WINGS!

It is a Chinese Restaurant owned by a Korean afterall!


It's a drumette, deep fried and crispy-fied, and smothered with this sweet and spicy sauce that is fingerlickingoood!

It's also really really meaty, like a chicken wing on steroids!

I aimed for 91 to beat that guy who's eaten most wings! and on my third wing, I thought I'd do even just 40 to at least make it to the Wall of Fame.

I stopped at five. wehehe.
And so did Nang Marielle.

Aside from the wings, there's another thing you've gotta try at Great Sea's - THE BLACK BEAN NOODLES


It wasn't love at first sight nor first bite. But it's one of those dishes that grow on you..the more you eat, the more you love!!










One thing to remember when eating with Nang Marielle is that she doesn't stop at only two dishes ;p "amo gid ko na ya halin sang una, indi ko ya kontento kung duwa lang sud-an!"

so our table always looks like we're eating for four people when there's only just the two of us.

loooooook!


YEAH RIGHT! ;p

..so we also got the Wonton Soup (which was a disappointment!), the Combination Fried Rice (which we never got to touch!), and the Fried Spicy Smelt (mediocre!). We ended up bagging all of them and bringing them home.

lesson learned : when eating at Great Sea's, just eat the wings and the black bean noodles and sleep thereafter :))

*burp!*

All the Single Ladies!

I got this message from my aunt yesterday on Facebook:

Tang, i will pray for a "partner' for you...even a friendly one lang...wala lang, i just feel it will spark up life a li'l bit...not that you need it or be more happier..life is good to you...just would like to spark it a li'l more hehe...i know how it feels to be "alone' sometimes, at times. whatever...love you Tang

...out of nowhere, like a deer crossing the freeway in the middle of the night. That message took me aback completely, I think it's so uncalled for. I love my aunt and this isn't against her, but. it's like "why the heck are you still single?!" IN YOUR FACE! ..like I don't know it yet! Am I that pathetic for still being single at 24? Am I really a desperate case, an old-maid-in-the-making?? Why do I feel like I am being attacked by this issue from all directions?? "teh may migo ka na? ngaa wala pa haw?"

I'd be lying if I say that I don't care and that I'm not wanting to have someone in my life. Of course I do! Even Erik Erikson said everyone goes through that intimacy vs. isolation stage of social development. But I probably wouldn't care as much if everyone else around me does not keep reminding me that it's time. With everyone I mean even my mom and my grandma!

I can't make things fit if they don't. Maybe I'm just unlucky that the guys who've come in my life just don't feel right. Yes I am a "feel" kind of girl, than a "try" kind of girl. And maybe I really should be putting myself more out there. Date some more. Give people chances. Give opportunities chances. But then, that's not gonna be me anymore. I just believe that the right guy will come when it's time. God's time. That I really don't have to look for him. That he will feel right when he is right.

One of my friends here in the States met this amazing guy online. Who woulda thunk it, a gorgeous guy inside out, looking for love in an online dating site?? You start to think, there must be something wrong with him..?! But then you follow it up with, but there's really nothing wrong with my friend and she did it. She encourages me all the time to try it too, `coz I might just stumble on someone like, let's just say his name is, Adam (my friend's boyfriend). But I just can't. Just can't.

Someone tweeted : "I’ve built a wall. Not to block anyone out, but to see who loves me enough to climb over it." #TLS ... and in my case, who I love enough to let them climb over it.

All I know is that... when I fall in love again, it will be forever. And when I give my heart, it will be completely. I feel like I have saved so much love in me that I have so much to give and I can't afford to waste it with someone because I just wanna try it out. Can't even go on a second date with someone if I don't feel the spark the first time!

Yeah, maybe they're right, what the heck is wrong with me?

But in the pit of my stomach, I know it'll come... every train has a destination.

The Best Egg Dish I've Ever Eaten

The best egg dish I've ever eaten is hands down -- PANERA BREAD'S SPINACH AND ARTICHOKE BAKED EGG SOUFFLE!!!!

I don't usually like how they cook their eggs here in the States. For me, they're bland and jiggly.. eeeyuck. I guess I'm used to my eggs overcooked, browned and crispy on the bottom and the sides, and the yolk, set.

But this egg souffle gave me and the humble egg a second chance!!

The souffle itself is light and fluffy, a little gooey, and warm, and cheesey!! Folded into the egg are spinach, Romano cheese, red peppers and artichoke hearts, lightly flavored with a hint of garlic & a dash of Tabasco®.
It's like an omelette that has lost weight and became as airy as a cloud!!!

...and they bake it inside their own sweet French pastry dough. The crust is flaky, and light, and crispy but still has that slight chewiness like a croissant!

It's my tiny piece of heaven especially after a long night at work!

and the bonus... I don't need to go to a fancy French restaurant to get this. coz Panera Bread is just a few steps away from my apartment! ..ain't I lucky?! only for this egg souffle!

what's the best egg dish you've ever eaten? :)

Let's do KUMA!

If you were to pair heavy metal music with food, what would it be?

Definitely a humongous, pure carnivores' delight BURGER!



KUMA'S CORNER is where you get it here in Chicago - consistently dubbed as one of the best in the state, if not the country! Soo not your typical burger joint! You are greeted with loud heavy metal music; and naturally, the staff are all heavily inked and pierced. The burgers are named after famous metal bands like Megadeth, Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin... ahhhh let me just *copy paste!*

“OUR FAMOUS KUMA BURGER”
Bacon, Cheddar, Fried Egg - $10
Kaijo
Bacon, Bleu Cheese, Frizzled Onions - $10
Black Sabbath
Blackening Spice, Chili, Pepper Jack, Red Onion - $12
YOB
Smoked Gouda, Bacon, Roasted Red Peppers, Roasted Garlic Mayo - $11
Iron Maiden
Avocado, Cherry Peppers, Pepper Jack, Chipotle Mayo - $12
Slayer
Pile of fries topped with a ½ lb. Burger, Chili, Cherry Peppers, Andouille, Onions, Jack Cheese, and Anger - $13
Neurosis
Cheddar, Swiss, Sautéed Mushrooms, Caramelized Onions, Horseradish Mayo - $11
Metallica
Buffalo Sauce, Bacon, Bleu Cheese Dressing - $10
Clutch
Cheddar, Swiss, Jack, Smoked Gouda - $10
Mastodon
BBQ Sauce, Cheddar, Bacon, Frizzled Onions - $12
Led Zeppelin
Pulled Pork, Bacon, Cheddar, Pickles - $13
Judas Priest
Bacon, Bleu Cheese Dressing with Apples, Walnuts, and Dried Cranberries - $12
Motorhead
Goat Cheese, Kalamata Olives, Oregano, Tzatziki, Onion, Tomato - $12
Mayem
Sliced Jalapenos, Pancetta, Pepper Jack, Gardinera Mayo - $11
Pantera
Roasted Poblano Pepper, Bacon, Chedder and Monterey Jack, House made Ranchero Sauce, Tortilla Strips - $12
Plague Bringer
Roasted Garlic Mayo, Tortilla Strips, House Made Hot Sauce, Fresh Garlic, Pepper Jack, Sliced Jalapenos - $12
High On Fire
Siracha Hot Chili Sauce, Prosciutto, Roasted Red Pepper, Grilled Pineapple, Sweet Chili Paste - $12
Lair of the Minotaur
Caramelized Onions, Pancetta, Brie, Bourbon Soaked Pears - $13
Megadeth
Chorizo and Red Potato Hash, Pico de Gallo, Cayenne Avocado Cream, Tortilla Strips - $13
Brujeria
Cream Cheese and Chorizo Stuffed Jalapeno Popper, Cheddar Cheese and Charred Tomato Salsa
Baroness
Chimichurri, Fire Roasted Corn Salsa with Bacon and Toasted Red Peppers, Green Beans and Grated Asiago Cheese. - $13
Insect Warfare
Panko-Crusted Goat Cheese, Bacon Roasted Corn and Green Chili Medallion, Topped with Roasted Corn, Cilantro, Green Chili Salsa and Paprika Creme Fraiche. - $13

..when you go the first time, of course you must try the famous Kuma Burger!



look at that big boyyy!!!! what makes Kuma's Corner's burgers special is the bread! It's not the hamburger bun you grew up with. The bun is a cross between ... hmm .. a pretzel and a brioche -- it has to be a stubborn kind of bread to carry all the weight!

Kuma's is small place for the crowd it draws, that the last we went, we had to wait an hour for a table. But it was well worth it.... Not just for the food, but the experience altogether. If you're a foodie and you go to Chicago and you don't go to Kuma's Corner, rethink your being a foodie! :))

That Lair of the Minotaur sounds yummmm-ieee!

Here's me, ready to devour! (Tattoed Zooey Deschanel look-a-like waitress behind me)


And me, defeated by the Kuma :(

Skyline Drive

I gave up on counting sheep this morning and drove to The Harbor very, very early. like 5am early.

to catch the sunrise.

Yes, better than coffee! :)

These pictures are unedited. The raw beauty of the sunrise by Lake Michigan. One of the most breathtaking sights I was blessed to witness!

aaahhh.. peace.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOwI8AQhBiY

Cheers to Sunrises!

This is supposedly strictly a food blog. but since this blog is the only world that revolves around me, I might as well...own it. After all, I finally had the nerve to start one, after considering it for uh, a long time.

You might already know me, if you're reading this. But let me introduce myself all over again.

I am a Registered Nurse living in a Chicago suburb for almost 3 years now. I have been working in the Medical Oncology/Palliative Care Unit of a community hospital in another suburb for about a year and a half. And I have been living by myself in a small apartment for exactly a year.

I am here not just because I have to make a living. This is more of a personal journey for me. I am the little girl with itchy feet, wanting to see the world, eat the world, walk the world, at my own expense. I am here to show the world (myself) that to be brave and adventurous does not always mean jumping off a cliff.

You see, my life back home, though most say ideal, is constricted. Stereotyped. Sheltered. Coming from a small town, you become like a word in a dictionary - one with a definition, a reference.

Fragile and perfect are things I am NOT and never intended to project, but seem to always catapult back to me. (please don't think I am being arrogant, if you are open-minded enough, you get my point... don't you?) The life I had / have is far from perfect. But don't get me wrong. I am truly grateful for the family I have. My parents, for me, are like no other. I am beyond words as to how blessed I am for having them. The only downside to that, is the comfort. That zone of convenience. Which I chose to break away from.

I am here because I am just a girl wanting to let her hair down. To make mistakes. And to learn from them without having someone pointing them out. To eat in a restaurant or walk in the mall all by myself and not even care what other people think. To be clumsy, and dumb. To be in a crowd of strangers. To decide. To fix my own broken lamp. To pay my own bills. To hate folding my own laundry, but to do it anyway. To eat Cheetos for breakfast, because I have nothing else. To be broke.
To get to know people for who they really are, and to get to show people who I really am.
I am here, to just, not care.

To be free.

And here, I have rediscovered my love for food. And music. And travel. And people. And writing. I have rediscovered my love for myself.

To make this blog more emo than it already is (harhar), I want to share with you The Harbor. The place I go to, to think, or not think. It is one of the most beautiful places in Chicago. The most beautiful for me.




Thanks..for listening :)

Not your sandwich-next-door!

Ba Le was my first taste of a Vietnamese Sandwich and I fell in love!

Understated places like this are worth the drive!

Ba Le is a small, eat-and-go Vietnamese bakery / deli in uptown Chicago (Broadway and Argyle) selling a variety of sandwiches, from sardine, to roasted pork, to roasted beef, to pate, to vegetarian. They also sell an assortment of Vietnamese desserts, pastries, meats, and salads.

But the star for me is the #9
THE BBQ PORK SANDWICH!

It is uh-may-zingg!!!
First of all, what makes a sandwich a sandwich is THE bread. and Ba Le bakes their own French Baguette, fresh everyday, toasted to perfection with every order. It is the perfect vehicle for what lies in between -- the PORK. Being a Filipino accustomed to the taste of streetside "bbq," this definitely hits home! -- sweet, smokey, salty. Almost like tocino, but uniquely Vietnamese. That hint of lemongrass is subtle yet strong enough to give the pork such great flavor. And then there's the SLAW - fresh carrot and jicama (singkamas) dressed in some sort of vinegar dressing / pickling liquid, sweet, slightly sour and tangy. One can NOT miss the jalapeno, especially for a hothead like me! It adds the perfect amount of heat without numbing your palate. Everything is topped with fresh cilantro - an acquired taste, but a Vietnamese sandwich does not reach self-actualization without cilantro.

Everything just works together in this sandwich! It is the perfect size for a filling lunch. Every corner of your tongue is put to good use - sweet, sour, salty, spicy. The farthest my $3.50 has ever gotten!

By far....the best sandwich I have ever eaten!